16th Century Dreamin...

So as I was killing myself with a work out last monday I had some time to think…So I’m working with a Show Choir in Gillette Wyoming… I know, even now as I go back and read that sentence I'm like... say what? But I swear it’s real! So anyway, I’m killing myself, WAYYYYY behind the group towards the end of our work out and I start talking to myself… rather loudly I might say, so any people hiding in the trees, who I’m pretty sure exist, you know, Hill people and all that, anyway, these hill people were probably laughing their a$$es off at my crazy ramblings…

So I’m talking to God about how pathetic my efforts during this work out were and I’m like, “You know, sometimes I wish I lived in medieval times, because those people were praised for being fat… if you were fat, you were rich! You could just sit at home ALL DAY LONG having people fan you (you know because fat people get hot (trust me)) and eat whatever they wanted… exercise was for peasants who had to work for their food… eww! Why can’t it still be like that? I totally want to sit on my bed all day, watch my Veronica Mars DVD’s while some peasant who had to get up at 4AM to feed his kids fanned my fat butt… yup that would be the life!

But no… I had to be born in 1989, when we have Jane Fonda Bust Your Buns VHS’ to tell me how to live my life. I had to watch teenagers jog circles around me and try not to cry… it’s ok to laugh, I was crying because I’d only gotten 3-hours of sleep the night before, not because I’m pathetic…

So I want to make a formal request… can we please go back in time… can we be smart like Henry the Eighth, like those who killed thousands of innocent people during the crusades, why can’t my world be more like Prince John from Robin Hood… just be carried around by hippos and have a snake best friend… ya, that would be the life. I think I’ll write my Congressman.